Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Conversations Today at Work

Tiger Balm is actually made from ground up cancer tumors cut off of wild tigers.

"I think I just inhaled part of my nugget."

"My name's James Beaver. Beaver like the animal."

Mad World

I sometimes have an easy time shrugging off bad things in the news. We all do it, "that's politics" or "that's human nature". Sometimes you cant shake the things you read or hear about.

What kind of world are we living in anymore?

WASHINGTON - Twelve-year-old Deamonte Driver died of a toothache Sunday. A routine, $80 tooth extraction might have saved him. If his mother had been insured.

On his last day in CIA custody, Marwan Jabour, an accused al-Qaeda paymaster, was stripped naked, seated in a chair and videotaped by agency officers. Afterward, he was shackled and blindfolded, headphones were put over his ears, and he was given an injection that made him groggy.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Enough with the war already!

Yet another reason why I hate Fox News and everyone that works there all the way down to the people that clean up the place after everyone goes home. What they're open 24 hours? Oh, well I hate that too.

In a recent attempt to justify his own overzealous and extreme coverage of Anna Nicole's death AND to take a cheap shot at other journalists who are still covering the WAR, Fox News host John Gibson had the following to say on his radio show on Friday:

GIBSON: Now I submit to you that that is a real, honest-to-God drama. Now it may not fit the high-minded views of a lot of news professionals, people who think that their news program is just another part of Foreign Affairs Quarterly. That only a certain kind of news is worthy of their discussing. Those people are snobs. They’re people who, when they see a story, go, “Ew, icky. I don’t want to do that.” I did this for years. I’ve been doing a long time. I’ve approached many stories and said, “That story isn’t worth our trouble.” It has always been a mistake. Always. Every single time I did it. So when I see people like this guy —

[CLIP ANDERSON COOPER] There’s a war on, there’s a war on, there’s a war on.

GIBSON: Oh, there’s a war on, there’s a war on. Maybe, just maybe, people are a little weary, Mr. Cooper, of your war coverage, and they’d like a little something else. Maybe that’s why they all thundered to this story.

[CLIP ANDERSON COOPER] There’s a war on, there’s a war on, there’s a war on.

GIBSON: My complaint about this is what you’re listening to when you hear that guy lecture the audience, is you’re listening to news-guy snobbery. Essentially saying, “I’m better than you. I know what you want to hear about, but I’m better than that story. I’m too high class for that story. I won’t stoop to what you want to hear about.”

I’m not playing that. People want to hear about the Anna Nicole story, I’m happy to tell them.

Oh John, I'm glad we have YOU to defend us against "news-guy snobbery". Hell if we didn't have you and your friends at Fox, we wouldn't know what to think or how to act. We wouldn't even have known we were victims of snobbery to begin with!

And remember Fox has that super special sixth sense that tells them that they know you want to hear about Anna Nicole Smith. Then again they have no other basis of comparison because they cant do two simultaneous shows at once to compare it too. So they have to compare themselves to CNN and frankly, they aren't looking much better these days.

Let me break this story down for everyone (not to be to snobberish or anything):

  • A woman was born.
  • A woman became famous for showing her tits off in Playboy.
  • A woman got into money, drugs and fucking lots of men.
  • A woman got knocked up.
  • Several years and nearly a metric ton of human fat moved thru this woman.
  • A woman's son dies.
  • A woman's upset.
  • People are upset that she might be so upset she might get fat again and not show her tits anymore.
  • A woman turns to her money, drugs and sex with lots of men.
  • A woman is found dead in her apartment full of methadone and Trimspa supplements.
  • A woman has fucked SO many men no one knows who her baby's dad is.
  • A custody battle ensues.
  • A crying Judge decides who will take the corpse.

Now replace "A Woman" with "Anna Nicole Smith" and you have the WHOLE STORY!

She died 19 days ago.

Now ask yourself if you know how many men, women and children died in Iraq, Darfur, Afghanistan, Somalia, or half-a-dozen other places in the last 19 days. How many more tons of poisons have we pumped into our air and water in the last 19 days? How many more billions of dollars is our country into it for over the last 19 days? How many children were born? How many mad cows went sane? How many things got cloned and how many times did Condoleeza Rice NOT look pissed about something in the last 19 days?

If you cant answer any of those questions with a + or - accuracy or 5% then you are watching WAY TOO MUCH FOX FUCKING NEWS!!!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

I have seen the light!

So last night my friend Jason and I went down to Circuit City in Beavercreek and picked up my new television.

Here it is in the back up Jason's Durango. We are lucky it fit, the box was bigger than I thought it would be and since it's not a plasma we were able to lay it on it's side.

Here's a shot of it from the front seats. The back seats are folded flat and it filled the whole back.

So we got it home and unpacked and after some snow blowing, salt throwing and general fucking around, I finally sat down with my friend Nate (lucky sucker got off work early) and some McDonalds and fired the bad boy up.

Here it is in my living room all fired up and playing Futurama (episode: Parasites Lost). The blue box on the image is to show you the size of my old TV a Sony (yuck) 36" CRT beast. Yeah the new one is that fucking bigger. This picture really doesn't do the the size of this thing justice - it's enormous when you are sitting there watching it.

The stand I have it on is up too high, so you dont sit totally centered with it (which dims the picture a tiny tiny bit). So I have to go buy a lower stand made for these giant TV's.

When you line up with the exact middle the picture is almost 3D it's so real and deep. We played a ton of XBOX 360 and Dead or Alive 4 blew our fucking minds. It was the most amazing thing I've seen from a TV with the 360 running in an upscaling 1080p mode. On some of the finishing poses the hands literally looked 3D out of the screen.

This TV is REALLY bright and REALLy black. It's got a 10,000 to 1 contrast ratio. The blacks are very black and the bright light is almost more than you can stand to look at. Many times it would get super bright and we would be squinting or looking away as it was so bright. Cool thing is it has a photo-eye on it and it will brighten or darken the screen according to the rooms lighting.

Okay enough about my awesome TV. I would HIGHLY suggest anyone to buy this exact model, I am loving it so much it's insane.

Sunday, February 18, 2007

You will be mine!!!

Oh yes I am finally getting a big screen TV. WOOT! This Wednesday I am going down to Circuit City and getting my big screen HDTV. Here's the specs:

Samsung 50" DLP Projection HDTV
  • 1080p (1920 x 1080) resolution
  • 10,000:1 contrast ratio
  • Built-in HDTV tuner
  • 2 HDMI inputs
  • 16:9 aspect ratio
  • DNIe video processor
I cant wait. I am super excited, even though about 2 days later I am going to have HUGE buyer's remorse like I do when I buy anything more than $50. But since I will have this TV for a long long time, it's a good investment and Circuit City is having an awesome sale on it right now.

And this Tuesday before school, I will be picking up the new XBOX 360 game, CRACKDOWN. I cant wait to play it in full upscaled 1080p glory! WOO HOO!

Oh and I will finally be able to finish playing Dead Rising with this TV as I will be able to read the on screen text again.

Next will be to upgrade to HD programming from the cable company (and later using Vista to do HD DVR or a HD Tivo but that's a ways off).

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

The snow has arrived

I am sitting at work right now. I'm the only one aside from a guy downstairs who lives in the building next to ours. Only one other person was able to make it in (thanks Brendan). Four guys had to stay the night here, but they all made it out this morning and are on their way home.

We had to close first shift down. Pretty crazy only the second time we have ever closed in over 10 years. The roads should be fine for second shift to open up though.

The Jeep made it thru the snow. Yay Jeep. :) Except the defrosters and heater kinda crapped out and didnt get warm enough so I had to keep wiping the windshield clean to see coming in.

The town I work in is up to it's old tricks again with their glorious snow removal. Thanks to the efforts of their plow trucks last night and the maze they made it took me 20 minutes to just get out of town. Not because of slow driving but due to the fact they plowed most of the roads shut so we had to follow their path as it looped all around.

They dont have a place to haul off all their snow, so they are making their huge ass piles of snow again downtown. Our street is one of the lucky ones to get this treatment and the pile is growing and growing. At least they are out there trying.

Oh well, I am going to finish some stuff up here and go home in case I need to come back and work tonight. I hope to have pics later.

Monday, February 12, 2007

Waiting for the snow

Weather reports are saying we are going to get between 7 and 15 inches of snow between midnight tonight and midnight tomorrow.

But then again this is Ohio, so it will probably end up being sunny and 95 tomorrow.

They are also calling for freezing rain and sleet, so that will make for some fun driving. I hope everyone makes it in to work okay and home again safe. I hate bad weather. I really miss school because it would close and you could stay home and play in the snow or jack off or jack off in the snow.

In other news, I went back to the Y for the first time since starting school again. Gotta work on the guns so I can start a show of my own. I wouldnt have to if Andy would ever give me tickets to his instead of the his teasing quick flashes at work.

I think I might go again Wednesday. I can work a Monday, Wednesday, Friday routine in to my current schedule.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Conversations Today at Work

I am brining out a new feature to the old blog. Someone I used to know posted the crazy shit we end up talking about at work on her blog and I got thinking about that today and decided it would be good to start this concept up again.

Let me preface this, there will be some crazy shit in these posts and all names have been changed to protect the innocent. ;) Sometimes these posts might be long or short depending on how many I remember to actually blog about.

---Conversations Today at Work---
  • What's the opposite of a turd? Some thought it was pee, but I decided that it's food and we all agreed.
  • In a pinch a dead frozen pigeon (or dove) can be used to transport semen to artificially inseminate someone far away.

The insanity of Adams, Wisconsin

The good people of Adams, Wisconsin are psychopaths. I dont know which one of them decided on the naming conventions of their roads, but I do understand the concept that each one of them live with this every day and dont rise up and over throw the local government to change these names.

To understand what I am talking about, look at this first map of the area.

There are about 7 or 8 unique roads here and 3 name variations: Evergreen, 14th and 15th. When combined with the suffixes of Road, Lane, Court, Drive and Street you get a lot more possibilities to name, what appears to be, every 5 feet of road as something different.

More proof of their insanity, let's travel about a 1/2 mile east to the Second Map.

There are a great many more roads in this section of town all sharing the names of 10th, 11th, 13th, Evergreen, Fawn and Rose.

Here are some simple directions from one randomly selected Point A to a randomly selected Point B:
  1. Take State Route 13 to 13th ave and turn right (south), Drive Past Evergreen DRIVE and continue south.
  2. Turn Left on Fawn Ave and continue around the curve where it turns into 11th Drive.
  3. Continue around the next curve where it turns into Evergreen Lane.
  4. Take Evergreen Lane to 11th Avenue and turn right.
  5. Follow 11th Avenue to Fawn Court and turn right (if you see Fawn Drive you went too far south).
  6. Follow Fawn Court until it curves and turns into 11th Court. Take 11th Court south and turn on to Fawn Court.
  7. Follow that to the large 180 degree left turn until it turns into Fawn Drive
Pretty confusing, eh?

"Hi, I'm a PC." "And I'm a Liar, er Mac."

Apple has just released a new Macintosh commercial entitled "Security". And while close friend and long time reader, Scott found it funny even if not relevant - I take a deeper exception to it.

Granted this post may come from a deep-seated desire to have my own say about the PC vs. Mac battle after reading too many comments on Digg regarding this debate. And I fully understand that while I hate the concept of the internet turning into one giant place where everyone has their say and expects everyone else to be swayed by their opinion - I find it a necessary vehicle and after all this is MY blog. So Piss off.

At any rate, the new Apple commercials are taking shots at Vista and there's good reason - Apple is worried and they have good reason to be worried. This post isnt about Vista or comparing it to Apple's OSX. This is about how Apple lies or provides half-truths to hock it's wares.

The big issue I have right now is how Apple likes to tout that there are no virus's out that affect their system. This is 100 percent not true and it only serves to create an uninformed and ignorant user base, and push the ego of the average Mac user to the point of near total annoyance of anyone around them.

114,000 viruses? Not on a Mac.

By the end of 2005, there were 114,000 known viruses for PCs. In March 2006 alone, there were 850 new threats detected against Windows. Zero for Mac. While no computer connected to the Internet will ever be 100% immune from attack, Mac OS X has helped the Mac keep its clean bill of health with a superior UNIX foundation and security features that go above and beyond the norm for PCs. When you get a Mac, only your enthusiasm is contagious.

So no viruses for your Mac? Then this entry in the Apple store is kind of odd. Strange that companies would produce software for the reduction and cessation of viruses for the Mac when it's so immune. And it seems even more strange that it's sold on the very company store that touts the anti-viral strength their machines have.

More from

Numbers from Sophos, a world leader in integrated threat management solutions, developing protection against viruses, spyware, spam and policy abuse for business, education and government. The Sophos Security Threat Management Report 2005 [links to white paper after form] outlines the number and kind of attacks, while the March 2006 Top Ten reports the latest number of threats.


There are a number of Macintosh specific file viruses and worms, in addition to several thousand macro viruses which affect programs which run on Macintoshes.

Macintoshes can also act as carriers of viruses for other platforms.

Just some food for thought. And if you own a Mac and feel the need to comment on this post to prove me wrong, save your breath. You own a fancy contraption that is more status symbol than computer and more form than function.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Sweet God in Heaven!

Roto-rooter is having a contest that you could win the toilet that you see above. This is the most amazing thing I have ever seen.

The toilet of my dreams includes:
  • Philips™ 20-inch LCD TV and Star Wars DVD
  • Xbox™ 360 gaming system
  • Philips™ DVD player
  • Gateway® EMachine™ laptop computer with fully articulated robot arm
  • iPod™ with stereo docking station equipped with toilet paper dispenser
  • Roto-Rooter “emergency” button
  • Tivo™ recorder
  • Avanti™ refrigerator with beer tap, stocked with drinks and snacks
  • Magazine rack and subscriptions to Sports Illustrated, ESPN and GQ
  • Bike pedal exerciser
  • Cup warmer / cooler

Thursday, February 01, 2007

ATHF LED Assault on our Common Sense

"Remember Remember the 31st of January.
The Cartoon LED plot.
I know of no reason the Cartoon LED treason,
should ever be forgot."

I really cant believe this bullshit that happened in Boston and how the city totally overreacted.

In the city's defense, some of the 9/11 hi-jackers staged out of Boston and the city does have a responsibility to protect it's citizens, but they went WAY too far.

They said the objects (circuit boards with LED's, wires and batteries) looked sinister and as such the bomb departments were deployed to detonate many of the objects. If these guys arent trained enough to realize what these really are and the city chose to not do ANY detective work before reacting the way they did, then they deserve to be out the money it took them to grind Boston to a halt.