Saturday, February 25, 2006

Ranting Thru the Holidays

Originally posted on: December 22 3:04 PM

I apologize, but I've missed my weekly rant post during the move to MSN Spaces. Here we go though, without further delay - Cory's Weekly Rant!

10) People who push a shopping cart down your aisle with one thing in it and just MUST get thru.

There are tons of people out and about now, but do us all a favor and carry your bag of cotton balls in your hands, you dont need to cramp, already overly crowded, aisles with your shopping cart.

9) People who only want to talk to me about their broke ass computer.

Yes I know a LOT about computers and can pretty much fix anything involving computers and I am in control of an entire department, at work, that fixes computers all day long - BUT I can talk about other things besides computers. I am quite well versed in many subjects and can carry on all sorts of conversation. I have ideas, insights and opinions on a great many things outside of computers. And NO I wont fix your computer!

8) Inconsistent HTML Coding

I have ALWAYS loved Internet Explorer and hated everything else, so it never bothered me the little HTML coding quirks with it as it never affected me unless I had to design a site to be 100% browser agnostic. That was until Firefox. Now there is finally an alternative browser worth using and it adheres very strictly to the HTML standards and thus I still have to bounce between it and Internet Explorer to fully enjoy some sites.

7) People who bitch about the fact it's snowing

Look I dont like driving in it, shoveling it or getting pelted with it while I am trying to run around my backyard in the nude either, but you dont here me bitching from the first flake to the last. If you are one of these people, go to a window (preferably one with snow outside it) and close your eyes and when you open them look at the snow. I mean really take it in. Marvel like you did when you were a child. Be amazed at this blanket that covers everything and snuggles itself into every crack and slumbers upon every ledge. Snow is an amazing thing and your bitching doesnt make it melt any faster.

6) Churches and other group brainwashing centers

I know organized religion helps a lot of people do a lot of things, but I think we can all agree that organized religion throughout the years as been one of the biggest roots of evil in this world. I am not knocking anyone's beliefs in a higher power(s), just the fact that people find the need to group together to show off their nice clothes, try to absolve themselves of guilt in front of all their peers and give money to an institution more bent on it's own agenda then that of your eternal salvation.

5) Tags in clothes that when you rip them out it rips the garment

I know there is a way to sew those damn tags in so when they are ripped out, it doesnt rip out the whole seam and leave you with a big hole - so to all you people who design this stuff - START DOING IT THAT WAY YOU PRICKS!

4) Candy Canes

Yes I've said it - Candy Canes. They are like the Candy Corn of Christmas and they suck. Dont buy me the little ones because I get too sticky trying to eat them. Dont give me normal sized ones because once you get to the hook end you are locked in a struggle of snacking and keeping from impaling your septum. And those giant thick ones are just too hard to eat and last like 4 years. Hang a Candy Cane up to decorate but stop eating them or better yet, quit trying to give them to me.

3) Ford SUV's

I HATE every SUV that Ford makes and 99% of the time when there is an asshole on the road he is normally driving an Explorer or an Expedition - then again I live in redneck Ohio, so statistically that's a LOT of those SUV's. At any rate, dont fly past me on the highway in a blizzard at 90mph just because you think your 4wheel drive will save your ass. I cant count how many times this has happened to me only to locate the driver in a ditch a mile up the road. They're an SUV not a tank.

2) The lack of pictures of Peter Norton of the boxes of Symantec products

Now if this was a couple years ago, I would probably have been ranting about the fact that there are too many pictures of Peter Norton on Symantec boxes. I dont know what it is about his smug ass picture they used to sport on their products but I just wanted to kick or punch those boxes - and most of the time I did. Now I miss kicking and punching various software boxes in the store, so please Symantec put him back on at least one of your offerings.

1) Scrooges

You dont have to wear a Santa hat, light a menorah, dance a whatever or even put up a tree. But at least this time do something nice for someone (or lots of people). Embrace the spirit of shared caring with those you love and help those who need it. So dont be a scrooge, get into the vibe this time of year and make the world a better place - at the very least it will keep you busy so I dont have to listen to you bitch about it snowing.

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