I was able to leave work early today (big thanks to everyone at work who allowed me to do this). I went and saw Dad for about an hour. He is on his normal morphine dosage, but they have a kicker of Demerol now that he can take by pushing a button to help out.
Demerol is some serious medicine that makes you basically feel good. I had it once and if I ever get addicted to any sort of drugs, I hope its Demerol, cuz that stuff is good.
Then at 3pm I went and had my eyes checked out. The doctor finally figured out what is wrong with my left eye. I apparently have Cornea Kerotosis (or something like that). Basically my cornea is cone shaped and distorting the image I am seeing thru it. He said its degenerative and my produce scarring on my cornea that could develop into a severe vision loss. However he said if you don’t produce scarring by the age of 30 you are normally in the clear and he didn’t see any signs of scarring. I also have some astigmatism in my left eye causing problems too. He readjusted my prescription and they ground me a new lens for my left eye and it seems a lot better already. Then again I can’t tell much as my eyes are still dilated so it sort of hurts to look at anything. I am getting a pair of contact lenses. I will be able to wear them all the time and only take them out to clean them. He said they will be uncomfortable for about the first week, but after that my eye should "callus" up and get used to them. This will be way better than glasses because now I have a hard time focusing around my lenses and this way the correction will cover my entire field of vision, so I am pretty stoked about that.
That took about an hour then I went back out to see Dad again. Visited with another guy out there I know in for emphysema and my mom and sister were out there. After they left I stayed and sat with Dad till a little after 7pm when his pastor showed up.
My father's never been a church going man or one to speak about God or religion - so it's a little strange to see him reaching out like this to God. I hope it's bringing him peace and comfort. It's also a bit disconcerting because it really hits home that he is going to die.
He's in so much pain now most of the time we have begun to look for other options, such as a surgical impairment of a spinal nerve. Basically it's surgery that cuts a nerve in your spine and renders you paralyzed. We need to get more info on it and all of that. And my sister is going to investigate other VA clinics around the country about treating him more for the cancer.
We also have to look into getting on Medicare for him to help pay for this (he's already been turned down). I love living in a country where you basically have to lay in pain and die because you can’t afford to pay for some form of treatment or medicine. It's disgusting and one of the most inhumane things to see happen, especially when it happens to someone you love.