Saturday, February 25, 2006

I'm So Tired ...

February 01 10:45 PM

but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can't be heard

The first line of that part of the song grips me. I take it to mean that I am so tired (and beat down) but I cant stop, I must keep going.

Is there really a hero in all of us? I think there is. It's the part of you that picks you up when you fall down or drags you thru when you cant walk. What gives him the courage and tenacity to keep going?

I cant stop thinking about my father and that his death will probably be the first time I lose someone close to me. I can see most of it in my mind, I just cant feel it yet, because I've never felt it.

I cant stop thinking about how I can wrap my hands around his thigh - he's lost that much weight.

I think the "hero" in us learns from the example set by others. That's what my father does for me. He teaches me to be the man that I want to be.

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